First, quick follow-up to my last post: if you don’t follow the Oscars, Free Solo WON Best Documentary Feature, which means my cousin, Evan Hayes, is an Oscar winner! I’m super happy for him. There have been some articles about him since then, linked here!

So: song of the moment. I’ve had songs from Waitress here before, and here’s one that’s kind of underrated. The character singing, Dawn, has just started online dating for the first time and is anxious about it, which she expresses hilariously in this song. But while it’s a funny song, there is so much truth in here for those of us who have been unlucky enough to have to do online dating. For me, it’s been over eleven years now.

Eleven. Effing. Years.

And STILL I find myself like Dawn in this song, nitpicking the things guys do (He could eat Oreos/But eat the cookie before the cream), worrying about my future (You cannot be too careful when it comes to sharing your life/I could end up a miserable wife), getting anxious about what the guy will think of me (What if I give myself away, to only get it given back?/
I couldn’t live with that), catastrophizing (He could be criminal, some sort of psychopath/
Who escaped from an institution/Somewhere where they don’t have girls/He could have masterminded some way to find me) and worrying about what will happen if it DOES work out (Or even worse he could be very nice, have lovely eyes/And make me laugh, come out of hiding/What do I do with that?).

It works out for Dawn in the end. But I’m losing faith that it ever will for me, and this endless cycle of bad online dates- or GOOD online dates where the guy isn’t into me- is just absolutely miserable. The only thing more miserable would be resigning myself to a life where I never get to feel romantic love.